Monday, June 28, 2010

The Pursuit of Happiness


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I have been listening to the song “Pursuit of Happiness” by Kid Cudi practically on repeat. It makes my heart flutter. I would put all the words on here but there is some slight cursing and I’m not trying to offend.

“Imma do just what I want
lookin’ ahead no turnin’ back
if I fall, if I die, know I lived it to the fullest
if I fall, if I die, know I lived and missed some bullets
I'm on the pursuit of happiness
and I know everything that shine ain't always gonna be gold
I'll be fine once I get it, I'll be good”

Maybe it is my 28th birthday looming over my head in a couple short weeks but I am feeling quite restless. I have been thinking about my life, my legacy, and if I really am living to my fullest potential. In my heart, I know that the answer is “no”. When I die, will I be satisfied looking back on my choices? I feel like I tend to play it safe; take the responsible route, the one that pleases everyone. Once upon a time I was exploding with creativity. I lived in Los Angeles, went to design school, and had dreams of moving to Paris for an internship. There was a point in my life when I made the decision to play it safe. I made a conscious choice to abandon my dreams. I though that I would end up lonely. I thought that following my dreams was selfish for some reason. Today, I don’t understand my own logic.
So here comes my own personal challenge. I am going to do something for myself

EVERY DAY

The thought sounds absurd, I know.

Instead of coming home from work, doing homework for a million hours, and going to bed, I am going to create something. Even if it is small or just a piece of something bigger, I am going to do it. And after I do it, I am going to document it. I will start out with 30 days.

It is my own pursuit of happiness, my mission for fulfillment and inspiration.
It sounds romantic but I have a feeling I am going to be sleeping less.
Probably cranky.

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“It’ll be fun, it’ll be a thrill. Something stupid, something bad for you, just something different. Isn’t this the point of being young? It’s your choice. People can live a hundred years without really living for a minute. You climb up here with me; it’s one less minute you haven’t lived.”
-Gilmore Girls

Some pictures that make me feel “alive”:

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All photos via weheartit.com

P.S. day one starts tomorrow

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Love,
Nat

5 comments:

Ro said...

That's my favourite Gilmore Girls quote ever! (slight obsession...) this sounds like a really good idea, good luck! :)

Unknown said...

Hey! A fellow AZ girl on the pen pal list! :) Cute blog! And when I send you a card it'll get there the next day!! :)

Marla Rae Morrison said...

I can't wait to see what you create! Love this post! Great pictures! I love the one of the swing! It is one of my all time favorite things to do that always makes my heart smile! : )

Venassa said...

I enjoyed this post cause I'm feeling similar. I don't really feel like I'm LIVING life, I'm just going through the days.
Can't wait to hear what you're creating.

Chantel said...

Natalie you are such an inspiration to me! This post just brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for your honesty and I am so proud of you!

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