Where did my baby go?!

Coral is officially too big for her toddler bed.
The thought of her growing up practically crushes my soul.
Soon she will be in kindergarten, then dating…
Getting married… AAHHH!
Anyhow, I have been searching high and low for the perfect big girl bed for my perfect little lady.
She has a pretty small room and an obscene amount of toys.
I think I want a loft bed so that she can still have space below to play. Here is some of my favorites so far:

The mattress for this one is in the top cottage part. Fun!



from here

This manufacture lets you build the bed with all the components that you want. It starts with just a twin frame and you choose the legs, shelves, fabric and all accessories. I totally ordered the catalogue.



from here

This one has all sorts of fun stuff. I can’t have it though because it is from Europe. Boo.



from here

My search continues. Wish me luck.

Love,
Nat

Recluse

So I may have disappeared for a few days…weeks. My sweet little 95-year-old grandma died and it made me really question a lot of things.
And therefore, hide.

I will start off saying that she died peacefully
Just how she wanted it, in her sleep.
No suffering or sadness leading up to it.
My great grandpa dies when I was about 8 and I don’t know that I really understood what was going on. This grandma is my first relative to die in my adult life.
I thought I would be devastated, cry myself to sleep every night.
Instead, I feel confused and unsettled.
Not about where she went, but by what I am doing.



First area of confusion…religion.
I was raised Mormon until I was about 12.
Then nothing.
I have a sense of spirituality and when I am really scared or confused, I pray.
I feel comfortable with the idea that there is a God that protects me.
For a while, I was doubtful, but not now.
I want to believe that this is not it.
That this world is not my last chance.



Since my grandma passed, I have been looking very closely to how I spend my time.
I have been thinking a lot about what I will leave behind.
What will people remember, what will I remember?
What moments in my life will I be proud of?
I want to be sure that everything that I do is because it will make me or someone that I love happy.

I don’t want to waste a minute of my life being idle.
I don’t want to function out of habit or just being comfortable.
I wonder if I live up to my full potential or if I am wasting myself.
All of this spinning around in my head all the time is making me slightly crazy.
Just slightly.

What do you think heaven is?
What makes you feel alive?


Love,
Nat

P.S. I know I have lots of letters to write back. I will do it soon, pinky swear.

Home Sweet Home

I am back home now from a week and a half vacation on the beach. We normally go to San Diego this time every year but this year we went to Long Beach instead. San Diego is awesome but it gets so crowded and kind of rowdy for a family vacation with the little one. We had such a blast playing on the beach and walking around the town. I am pretty exhausted because the drive home took much longer than anticipated. It took so long to get out of town because we lagged leaving the beach and ended up getting stuck in rush hour traffic trying to leave California. By rush "hour" I mean rush 3 hours.

Here is a few pictures from the trip:













I also came home to quite a few birthday cards from my new pen pals, which was quite adorable. I went and got some stationary and fun stuff so I am going to get writing.







Love,
Nat

So Much to do, So Little Time

I started day 1 of my own “pursuit of happiness” project. I decided to spend some time getting crafty. It is going to be a headband/belt. Since I have my upcoming beach vacation on my mind I wanted to make a starfish. Since I should be doing homework I did not get too far, it sure takes forever to sew one bead at a time. Sometimes I forget that I work full time, go to school, and have a hubby and three year old to love. Nevertheless, I will do something each day that makes me happy.



I got a list of all the people for a pen pal group that I just signed up for and spent way too much time reading everyone’s blogs. So many fun girls, I can’t wait!



I saved the best for last. My very first niece was born on Saturday.

Meet Chloe







She is to die for. Seriously, what newborn has a face like that? She is so alert and curious for a newborn. I love her so dear.

Love,
Nat

The Pursuit of Happiness

I have been listening to the song “Pursuit of Happiness” by Kid Cudi practically on repeat. It makes my heart flutter. I would put all the words on here but there is some slight cursing and I’m not trying to offend.

“Imma do just what I want
lookin’ ahead no turnin’ back
if I fall, if I die, know I lived it to the fullest
if I fall, if I die, know I lived and missed some bullets
I'm on the pursuit of happiness
and I know everything that shine ain't always gonna be gold
I'll be fine once I get it, I'll be good”

Maybe it is my 28th birthday looming over my head in a couple short weeks but I am feeling quite restless. I have been thinking about my life, my legacy, and if I really am living to my fullest potential. In my heart, I know that the answer is “no”. When I die, will I be satisfied looking back on my choices? I feel like I tend to play it safe; take the responsible route, the one that pleases everyone. Once upon a time I was exploding with creativity. I lived in Los Angeles, went to design school, and had dreams of moving to Paris for an internship. There was a point in my life when I made the decision to play it safe. I made a conscious choice to abandon my dreams. I though that I would end up lonely. I thought that following my dreams was selfish for some reason. Today, I don’t understand my own logic.
So here comes my own personal challenge. I am going to do something for myself

EVERY DAY

The thought sounds absurd, I know.

Instead of coming home from work, doing homework for a million hours, and going to bed, I am going to create something. Even if it is small or just a piece of something bigger, I am going to do it. And after I do it, I am going to document it. I will start out with 30 days.

It is my own pursuit of happiness, my mission for fulfillment and inspiration.
It sounds romantic but I have a feeling I am going to be sleeping less.
Probably cranky.



“It’ll be fun, it’ll be a thrill. Something stupid, something bad for you, just something different. Isn’t this the point of being young? It’s your choice. People can live a hundred years without really living for a minute. You climb up here with me; it’s one less minute you haven’t lived.”
-Gilmore Girls

Some pictures that make me feel “alive”:







All photos via weheartit.com

P.S. day one starts tomorrow








Love,
Nat

Happy Mail / California Dreamin'

Today started like any other day:
-Wake up
-Drink five gallons of coffee
-Drag my feet for an hour before brushing my teeth
-Getting ready for work in approximately 12 minutes

Anyhow, Lilo sent me a text while I was at work and it said, “ Hey baby, I think your happy mail came”. And then I said “OMG I want to leave work and come home now”. I did not leave work that minute, but you better believe I skipped the gym after work. My aunt Jenny used to write me letters every week while she was away for college. She would put fun stickers on it, draw me pictures, and cut stuff out of magazines and send it to me. I would get so excited and it reminded me of those days. That’s why I signed up for this Happy Mail stuff. I also just sighed up for another thing called Pen Pal Project. So pumped.

When I got home and opened my package I was so excited. My partner this month was Carrie from Seeker of Happiness Blog. She sent me buttons, jewels, a cupcake notepad, and a sweet picture of Jesus (which I loved Carrie) and a pattern for a weekender bag.



I was so excited about the weekender bag pattern because we are going to California in a week and staying for 9 days. I have bulky luggage but need a weekender bag. So I already started making it.


Note the chicken fabric that I will be cutting it out of. I am obsessed, what the heck?

Here is some pictures that Lilo took from Long Beach. His photography is breathtaking. Who knew that a door could be so awe-inspiring? Not me.









I convinced Lilo to make a blog about his photography. When he posts it I will share.

Xoxo,
Nat

This Makes Me Laugh

I have literally spent the last two to three hours of my life looking at chickens on the internet. I had no idea how in depth and insanely hilarious this task could be. Seriously? I think that fancy chickens could potentially overturn my life. I seriously can't stop laughing at these fluffy chicken faces. Here is a sample of what I have been stating at:

My favorite, the Silkie:



The Polish Fizzle:



And the Helmeted Guineafowl:



I hope you are laughing as much as I am right now.

Love,
Natalie

Daddy

I love fathers. I love my father. I love my daughter’s father.




Today was perfect. Coral and I went to the gym so Lilo could sleep in. Then we went and got stuff to make breakfast and some coffee. Coral and I made enough food for an army. But really it was three of us. I tried something new called an egg nest, or something like that. I saw them make it on the movie Moonstruck. Anyhow, it is a piece of toast and you use a cookie cutter to make a hole in the middle. You put the toast on a skillet and then pour eggs in it. I also put grilled peppers so it was like a tiny omelet in the middle of the toast. Next time I will fill it with more veggies, so pumped. I forgot to take a picture of mine but it looks a little something like this:





I helped Coral make Lilo a stepping-stone and a special mug. We had lots of fun and Lilo was quite impressed with Corals artistry.




After our little family morning we went to my daddy’s house. We grilled and swam and watched movies. I love my dad.



My dad is the greatest man ever. He has taught me to work hard and play harder. My mission in life is to make this man proud. Here is one special story about my little daddy:

I moved to Los Angeles for college and was determined to do everything on my own. My dad decided to come out to LA and visited my little apartment. I had a futon that I slept on and I was fine with it but the daddy was not. He wanted me to have a comfortable bed. He insisted that he had a bed at home that he did not need so he went back to AZ, got the bed, and brought it out to me. Months later I went home to visit and I went to my dad’s room and he had a mattress on the floor. He had given me his bed. Years later I still cry when I think about how selfless he is. He would literally give me the shirt off his back. I feel overwhelmed with gratitude when I think about my special little daddy.



Happy Fathers Day

Love,
Nat

A Week In My Life

My last week has gone like this:
1) wake up
2) Go to work
3) Homework for one million hours
4) Go to sleep
5) Repeat
Boring. I am doing finals for a psychology class which thankfully is over. Most of my classes are math, which I am good at. This class is about research writing, which I am just not that into. The main reason that I am just not that in to this psychology class is that doing research on crazy people makes me feel crazy and then gives me anxiety. I have also verified that I am in fact OCD. Great. I am sure that if anyone from work reads this they will just say… “duh Natalie, everyone knows you are OCD as heck”... whatever. I am done with this class and moving on to what I am comfortable with, math. Hopefully my next class does not consume my life so I can get back to enjoying this sweltering hot, ooh so lovely, Arizona summer.
I saw this picture in a magazine at the place where I get my oil changed and was so excited by it:


How much summer love do you feel when you look at that cupcake bouquet? They made it by putting one of those foam balls into the glass container and then using toothpicks to secure the cupcakes. Then they put green cupcake wrappers all around the cupcakes to look like leaves. Now I need to have a summer celebration in my newly fancified backyard porch that I will put more pictures of up in the near future.

Another thing I enjoy about summer is the freedom to have unruly hair. I love getting out of the shower, putting on a dab of TIGI curls rock, some macadamia oil, and voila… beach city,USA population, me.





PS. If you have course, slightly troll doll like hair, and have not yet discovered the magic of the macadamia, it will change your life. If you live in AZ, you can get the stuff from Stephie’s salon called Salon Krush. You‘re welcome.

Xoxo,
Nat

Kawaii Nails..?!

How is it that I have never owned some fancy Kawaii Nails such as these? Now I am not the girl that gets my nails done..ever. But I feel like these little beauties may be the exception. These might just complete my life.



Today I slept in until 10:00. That is unheard of. Coral slept at my moms house last night so I seized the opportunity to do all my laundry and then sleep in. Such a party animal, right? I am getting ready to go to the gym right now with my auntie Rhea-Lynn. She is the most amazing person ever to live. I will make a post just about her soon.

Good day lovelies,
Nat

My Adopted Chicken

Did I ever mention that I love birds? I love them dearly. Anyhow, we already have three chickens and I adore the heck out of them. Today we get a call from Lilos mama, Bette. She says that she found a lovely little chicken running around at a busy intersection. So she hopped out of her car and called the little lady and she came right to her and hopped her little chicken butt into Bette's car. Now for the bad news (that actually hurts my stomach). This sweet little chicken is all beat up. I think it looks worse than it is because she has some blood dried on her but she has an owie on her head. And her comb (top gobbler thing) is torn and flopped over. Her feathers are all patchy. She is the nicest little darling and she got right in my lap and snuggled up and took a little nap while I loved her. Here she is but as a warning, her owie might hurt your tummy too:





Her name is Pearl and I love her. I hope that she heals up quickly. The other ladies were trying to peck at her so we decided to have her sleep inside tonight since she has had a rough day.

On a side nite, Coral and I enjoyed some frozen yogurt before the gym. She wore pig tails and looks so grown up.



She is my favorite

Love,
Nat

Little Ladies Tea Party

I have officially started the planning for Coral’s fourth birthday party. It is not until November, but that’s how I roll. I decided to put up some from her third party. I think it was my favorite of all of her three thus far. Maybe some day I will get my act together and post some pictures from her first (hello kitty) and second (under the sea) parties. This party was a little ladies tea party. Each year I plan to make her a very special dress and have a very special little party. Lilo helped with the invitations because he is much better at Photoshop than I am.



We had lots and lots of treats. I made about one million Tiffany blue cupcakes with fondant flowers and chocolate leaves. They were drenched in pearls and goodness. WE had a candy bar with lots of treats and little goodie bags for the ladies. We also had cute little heart shaped finger sandwiches but I couldn’t find a picture of those. The tea was strawberry milk or some other fancy juices.



The party was such a blast. We got all the girls super foxy and did photo shoots. My sissy and I did all their makeup and my aunts did updo’s. Coral is a tomboy at heart so she did not partake. She was too busy riding the pony over an over. The girls, and one prince charming Cayden, decorated garden hats and painted paper fans. Once they were all dolled up they went to the little photo booth we set up and Lilo took their pictures.



Also note Corals dress in the pony picture. That little ruffle ball was quite the project but isn’t she so damn cute?! Her four-year party is the first one that she has had an opinion about and she says it is going to be a penguin party. I’m pretty excited about it!

Love,
Nat

A Walk in the Woods

I think that I spent most of my time this evening with my head in the clouds.
I am definitely thankful that today is Friday. That being said, I should have been doing homework and instead was doing this:

Rainy Day Stroll by namaddon featuring 1928 jewelry

I think it is time for me to spend some time on homework and stop dreaming about walking in the rainy woods...
while wearing a dreamy dress
pearls everywhere
holding a lace umbrella

Lets face it, it is a trillion degrees and dry as a bone in good 'ol Arizona.



Love,

Nat